Friday Flip Offs

I wasn't going to participate, because some things I just can't "talk" about here, but something happened at work that I'm just furious about.  Need a place to vent?  Check out Kludgy Mom's blog and join in.

So here I go (though once my husband reads this he may make me remove the post on the remote chance that any of our vendors happen upon this post somehow)!

To the vendor who emailed "Please refer to our mail of July 1, in which we forwarded our first and final report.  Please refer to our email of July 9 in response to your July 8 status report.  At that time, we again sent you all of our documentation.  Now, for the third time, we are again forwarding the same documentation.  Please correct your records as this file is closed, and we would appreciate payment on our invoice.":

FLIP OFF!

First of all, that's no way to talk to your CLIENT.  Second, we never got your mail with your first and final report.  That's why we emphatically specify that you are to EMAIL your report.  Idiot.  Third, in asking you to close your file and send your invoice, we are not saying that you never closed it and sent your invoice.  In fact, we explicitly begin our email with "IF YOU HAVE NOT ALREADY DONE SO, please close your file."  Was it really necessary to send a snarky email because you don't like that we had to hound you to get your report to begin with, and now you are acting as if we are somehow troubling you because we want to be sure we are all on the same page???

What I'd really like to email back to you, but never will because my husband/boss would kill me it's unprofessional is this:

Dear Vendor,

Thank you for taking the time to ruin my Friday morning. I wanted nothing more than to come into the office and find that you are put out because I kindly asked you to close your file IF YOU HAD NOT ALREADY, so that we can ensure that everyone is happy and has a closed file. How on earth am I supposed to know that the invoice you sent with your report is your final invoice? For all I know, you're an idiot and still working on the file, doing things we didn't ask you to do, so that you can bill us more for it, then refuse to negotiate it when we confront you. Well you know what lady? I don't pay your invoice. My client does. Good luck getting that paid though! Don't expect me to cooperate in the efforts to collect your money though. Oh yeah...good luck getting future business from us. It's people like you, who don't know how to professionally deal with your clients, that we avoid. Guess I get the last laugh!