Friday, February 4, 2011

*Warning* ADULT CONTENT

This post isn't going to be risqué or have naughty pictures.  It isn't going to be an in depth study of my marital obligations.  But I'm going to write today about something that I have wanted to write about for a long time but haven't had the courage.  Primarily because I don't want to have people thing "Oh my gosh I can't believe that girl is writing about S.E.X.  Now I'm never reading her blog again."  Because it's not even an enticing blog post about sex.  It's just an observation.  So I'm just going to put it out there.

What I want to talk about today is "holiday sex".  C'mon...don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about.  I do not believe that my husband and I are the only couple who have "holiday sex".  In the beginning, almost 12 years ago, holiday sex was IMPERATIVE.  We didn't miss a holiday.  It was unheard of.  We felt like we had to celebrate every holiday...in that way.  Don't get me wrong.  We LIKED celebrating the holidays.

And then something changes.  As you grow older together, and especially when you bring kids into the mix, it's a little more complicated to have "holiday sex".  And for women I think it becomes less important (in general-not just the holidays).  Moms especially.  We are tired.  We've been busy all day, whether it be inside or outside the home.  We cook.  We clean.  We try to keep it all together.  And we forget to take care of ourselves.  Emotionally and sometimes physically.  And so we don't feel sexy.  We don't feel beautiful.  And we don't always get as excited about the holidays as our male counterparts do.

My husband and I still talk about "holiday sex", even if we happen to miss it.  And not to get too personal, but we haven't missed very many holidays!  Sometimes we just amusingly try to see if we can overcome the challenge that is fitting that in (no pun intended!) on the holidays.  But now I'm at a point in my life, and I do not think I am alone in this, whether there are 2 holidays where the tables are turned.

Men look forward to the holidays...because they know (or at least hope) it's a day they can count on celebrating.  Women, on the other hand, have two holidays where we can play the "Please Not Today" card, and get away without too much resentment.  Our birthday and Mother's Day.  I just find it amusing.  It's probably not even worth posting it here.

I guess I am just wondering if "holiday sex" is a part of your relationship...or are me and my husband just really weird? And how many of you out there look forward to Mother's Day or your birthday because you know you can say "You know what I REALLY want for my birthday?  To not have to have sex."  That way, if we do, it's MY choice.  But I don't have to feel guilty if I choose not to!

BoostMyBlogFriday

10 comments:

  1. Hahaha, I'm not married, so this post is not for me. But it's very fascinating that you guys have Holiday sex, and "please not today" on your birthday. Very, very funny.

    :-)

    I'm following you back. Thanks for the visiting me.
    -DP
    Hip Chick's Guide to PMS, Pregnancy, and Babies

    ReplyDelete
  2. I personally am all for holiday sex. We've been living in a hotel so we have missed some holidays. I can't believe you

    ReplyDelete
  3. Bonnie...was that mid-thought? What do you mean you can't believe me? You can't believe I wrote about that? Or that sometimes I don't want to have holiday sex?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey Jamie! Thanks for commenting on my blog and being a follower! I'll return the favor. ;)

    As for holiday sex, I have to say my husband and I are not really like that. We don't usually have schedules like that or times when my husband expects it. But we've only been married for just over a year! Things could change...

    I think you're cute and witty for writing about this. It's a part of life, right?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and following!! I'm returnin' the love! This post was awesome...although I have to admit, I don't think we've ever even talked about holiday sex. How did I miss that??

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ok, so, I'm a new follower from the Design It Chic blog hop, so this was the first post I read. I freakin' LOVE it! I miss holiday sex. I miss sex in general (my husband I still have it, but almost never), and I feel like I'm in the opposite boat as you- I don't think he wants it. What's a girl to do? Hope to read more posts like this.

    Shameless plug:
    follow me back?: http://mommytryit.blogspot.com/

    Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Holiday sex? Can't say that is us...we are...random. Talk once a month sex and maybe I can comment better! LOL
    I loved this post.
    ~Naila Moon

    ReplyDelete
  9. Holiday sex. Hmm! I am trying to think if we've ever had sex on Christmas, the more I think about it I'm certain we have on all the other holidays and NEVER during Christmas. Generally we have family over and well, our walls are super thin. That and I'm so not a good wife, hosting people exhausts me! I can totally see your point, I have no doubt your husband will not be bothered. :)

    ReplyDelete